Savory Tomato Tart……..ohh la la!

Tomato tarts

Tomato tarts

The Phone Books are here…The phone books are here!!! Am I showing my age or my nerdyness here? Not sure, but finally my tomatoes are here and it feels like that Steve Martin moment. They are smaller than I had thought, but since they have taken 6 months to ripen from a late cool spring and a summer that barely showed up I suppose I shouldn’t complain. They are super sweet, and there are plenty out there on the vine and I have already made 6 batches of roasted tomatoes.

Here is a wonderful recipe I found from Saturday Dish (http://saturdaydish.com) and though it calls for two identical tarts I made two different tarts just to change it up a bit. Glad I did as my second choice was awesome! It’s a pretty easy and quick dish too. Especially if you have half the groceries in your back yard. For the second tart I substituted blue cheese/parm and fresh basil. It was by far my favorite but they were both stellar!

Here’s all you do:
The Ingredients:
  • 1 package of frozen puffed pastry (2 sheets)
  • Flour (for dusting)
  • 3 medium-sized tomatoes, thinly sliced (for color use red, orange and yellow)
  • Olive oil
  • 3-4 sprigs of fresh thyme
  • Finely shredded Gruyère and pecorino romano cheeses (about 1/3 cup each)
  • Egg yolk mixed with 1 tablespoon of water (egg wash for binding and glazing the sides)
  • Course sea salt
  • Chives
  • (Optional) Balsamic vinegar or hot sauce to finish
The Method:
Makes 2 tarts
  1. Pre-heat oven to 400 F° and allow the puffed pastry to defrost according to package directions.
  2. Working on a lightly floured surface, unfold one of the puffed pastry sheets and roll into a flat square. Brush the edges with egg wash and fold the edges in (about 1/4 inch). Crimp with a fork.
  3. Working on the inside of the fold, prick the pastry with tines of a fork then lightly brush the inside with olive oil. Don’t miss this step as your pastry will be soggy.
  4. Arrange the tomato slices so they almost touch the inside of the folded edge and slightly overlap each other. (Note, if the tomatoes are cut too thick their juices could make the tart soggy, so slice them on the thin side.)
  5. Sprinkle with fresh thyme and lightly top with half of the cheeses.
  6. Brush the outer folded edges with egg wash.
  7. Repeat steps above for second pastry sheet. (Substitute other herbs and cheese)
  8. Bake in oven for 20 – 25 minutes until puffy and golden brown.
  9. Sprinkle with fresh chives and sea salt to taste.
  10. (Optional) Lightly sprinkle center with balsamic vinegar or hot sauce. Enjoy.

Serve with a fresh salad and home baked bread. You will sleep like a baby!

Bon Appétit!

Ahhhhh…..Autumn. Just in time for Pumpkin Cake.

Pumpkin Bundt

Pumpkin Bundt

Autumn. The most glorious season of all. And with it comes such beautiful veggies. I normally make a Thanksgiving Pumpkin bread to dream about, but this is the perfect little any time of day, easy to make Pumpkin cake. You don’t need a lot of time. You don’t need a lot of ingredients. A great cake for that weekend kayaking trip, or just to have with a cuppa. Delicious, light and you don’t even need the icing.

I took artistic license and added cloves, allspice, ginger and nutmeg (@ 1/4 – 1/2 teaspoon each) and very glad that I did. A sprinkling of confectioners sugar and some pumpkin seeds make this simple and elegant.

Here’s all you do:

For the cake:

  • 2 cups granulated sugar
  • 1 cup butter, softened
  • 4 large eggs
  • 1 cup canned pumpkin
  • 1 cup sour cream
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 3 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
  • 2 teaspoons baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon salt

 For the glaze:

  • 1 cup powdered sugar
  • 1 tablespoon milk
  • ½ teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 2 tablespoons canned pumpkin
  • ¼ teaspoon cinnamon
  • 2 tablespoons butter, melted and cooled
  • Preheat oven to 350° F. Grease and flour a 12-cup Bundt pan (I like to use Pam spray).  Add sugar and butter to a large mixing bowl. Beat on low until light and fluffy.  Slowly add the eggs, one at a time, and continue mixing until well incorporated.  Add the pumpkin, sour cream and vanilla, mixing on slow speed until well blended.  While mixer is still going on slow, add the flour, one cup at a time. Next, add the cinnamon, baking soda and salt. Blend until well incorporated. (NOTE: I added all the dry ingredients together and then blended into the wet mixture. Just because that’s how I always incorporate it. Do what you like best.)Pour cake batter into prepared Bundt cake. Bake for 50- 60 minutes or until a knife inserted into the center comes out clear.
  • For the glaze:
    1. Place powdered sugar in a medium bowl. Slowly whisk milk into the powdered sugar. Continue whisking until no lumps appear.
    2. Continue whisking while adding vanilla, canned pumpkin, cinnamon and melted butter.
    3. Once glaze is smooth, gently pour over the top of the Bundt cake, allowing to drizzle down the side of the cake.
    4. Slice, serve and enjoy.

I am soooo glad I added the nutmeg, allspice, cloves and ginger! Couldn’t help myself and happy I did. This was a lovely silky batter with no raisins and walnuts. Could not imagine it was going to be decent with out those but I wanted to stick close to the recipe and then decide. Yep, less is more here.

Welcome Happy Autumn.

Bon Appétit!

Swiss Chard Pesto

Swiss Chard Pesto

Swiss Chard Pesto

Did you know of such a thing? Well I am sure it’s been out there awhile, but without having grown so much I did a little digging and found this little ditty. It’s great. I throw it in a pasta dish, but it would be great on a cheese plate, or baked brie, or…..you get the idea. Give this a try in your pasta tonight and throw in a little cream and butter and onions and it will be very hard to leave the table!

Here’s all you do:

Swiss Chard Pesto

  • 2 tablespoons + 1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil
  • 2 cloves garlic, chopped
  • 1 bunch Swiss chard, stems removed (about 2 cups)
  • 1 cup walnuts
  • 2 ounces freshly grated pecorino cheese
  • 1 bunch of basil leaves (about 1/2 cup packed)
  • Kosher salt

Heat two tablespoons of oil and the garlic in a saute pan over medium heat. Once the oil is hot and the garlic has become fragrant, gradually add the Swiss chard, wilting it into the oil and sauteeing for a few minutes.  Set aside to cool. Meanwhile, combine the walnuts, pecorino cheese, and basil leaves in the bowl of a food processor.  Add in the cooled chard and garlic.  Pulse to roughly chop and combine the ingredients. Then, stream in the remaining 1/2 cup of olive oil while blending to your desired consistency.  Adjust seasoning with salt.

To freeze the pesto, fill an ice cube tray with leftover pesto and cover tightly with plastic wrap. Once the pesto cubes have frozen, they can be transferred to a ziplock bag and kept for a few months. I love any kind of pesto and pasta and it’s pretty healthy so you can’t go wrong. Bon Appétit!

Swiss Chard pickles……dang these are good!

Swiss Chard Pickles

Swiss Chard Pickles

I got this scary yummy recipe for my swiss chard. It was so cool to grow some easy and beautiful golden swiss chard (my first year growing swiss chard so forgive my giddiness) Who hoo.  The snails enjoyed it a little too much but that being said, I had to come up with a plethora of new recipes. This was super good……….SUPER good. I had never cooked with Sriracha before (find it in the asian aisle of most grocery stores). But it is surely going to be experimented with a LOT from here on out! Don’t say I didn’t warn you either, it is spicy! These pickles you can make in 10 minutes. Idiot proof. Nothing to it and it is so delicious. Great for bbq’s but I can assure you this Sriracha will become a staple in my soups this winter. Summer is still hanging on by a thread…….go for it.

Here’s all you do:

Ingredients

  • Swiss chard stems, chopped
  • 1 cup distilled white vinegar
  • 2 cups sugar (My 2nd batch I cut back to 1 1/2)
  • 1/2 onion, thinly sliced
  • 3 tablespoons Sriracha
  • 1/2 teaspoon celery seeds (only had ground)

Preparation

  • Make a mixture of vinegar and sugar (I boiled mine til just combined), then stir in onions, Sriracha, and celery seeds. Pour it all over the chopped stems, using 3 cups liquid for every 1 1/2 cups chopped stems. Throw it in the refrigerator for a few days, and you’ve got the ultimate refrigerator pickles.

Bon Appétit!

My great bake coffee cake mistake…….a humble yum!

Great bake Coffee Cake

Great bake Coffee Cake

I love making bundt cakes. They make sharing it with others so easy. It’s moist, you don’t need tons of icing. What’s not to love? Coffee cake was in order for the weekend and I found this great recipe from Lottie and doof (www.lottieanddoof.com- her site will make you so hungry don’t say I didn’t warn you!) and thought the ingredients sounded just right. Only I had my baking dish out on loan and wanted to make this a bundt. It was late……I shouldn’t cook when it’s late….and a few errors I did make. However, putting a coffee cake in a bundt pan means you can’t put the topping on it. So I made my favorite whipped cream and put in the swirl topping and topped the cake this way! Wow, I love that whipped cream. It was just heavenly. I even added it to my coffee! Wow. Just lovely.

This made a VERY large bundt cake! It was really great but I am going to make this in the correct dish next time just to see how that works. A definite keeper! Big Thanks Lottie.

Here’s all you do:

Sour Cream Coffee Cake with Chocolate Cinnamon Swirl

Crumb Topping
  • 3/4 cup all-purpose flour
  • 3/4 cup packed dark brown sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 3/4 cup pecans, toasted
  • 6 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into 1 inch pieces
Chocolate Cinnamon Swirl
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 1 teaspoon dark unsweetened cocoa powder
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon
Cake
  • 3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 2 sticks unsalted butter, softened
  • 2 cups sugar
  • 4 large eggs
  • 16 ounces sour cream
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
Crumb Topping:
Put the flour, sugar, and salt in bowl of food processor and pulse to combine. Add the pecans and pulse until they are finely chopped and incorporated. Add the butter and pulse until mixture looks like coarse sand. Cover and refrigerate.
Chocolate Cinnamon Swirl:
Mix ingredients in small bowl. (For my whipped cream version just add to 16 oz until it forms peaks. Chill until ready to serve)
Sour Cream Cake:
Preheat the oven to 350° F. Butter a 9×13-inch baking pan. Sift together the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt together in a medium bowl.
In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream the butter until smooth. Scrape down bowl and add sugar. Beat until the mixture is light and fluffy. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition and scraping bowl as needed.
Add the sour cream and vanilla and beat just until incorporated.  Add the dry ingredients in three additions, scraping down the bowl before each addition and beating only until each addition is just incorporated. Do not overmix.
Pour one third of the cake batter into the prepared pan. Use an offset spatula to spread batter evenly in pan. Sprinkle half of the chocolate cinnamon swirl mixture over batter, covering the entire surface of the batter. Spoon half of remaining batter over the swirl mixture and spread it evenly. Top with remaining swirl mixture, then the remaining batter, and spread the batter evenly. Sprinkle the crumb topping evenly over the top of the batter.
Bake in the center of the oven for one hour, or until a toothpick inserted in the center of the cake comes out clean. Let the cake cool on a wire rack for 30 minutes. Serves 16.

Enjoy with your friends and loved ones.

Bon Appétit!

Cowboy Caviar….so simple, super healthy!

Cowboy Caviar

Cowboy Caviar

Fresh and zippy. Before the feeling of summer is completely gone, here is a super healthy, simple and delicious recipe. Takes letter time to prepare and don’t skip the lemon juice! It makes this dish.  I found this a year ago and never made it last summer. Dug it up (thanks to What’s Gaby Cooking, Simple Sassy Gourmet…….great site http://whatsgabycooking.com where I found this from) and don’t miss out. You can make this even healthier if you don’t cook the bell peppers with the onion and corn. That raw movement is pretty good stuff.

Here’s all you do:

Cowboy Caviar

Ingredients:

2 cups fresh corn, cut off the cob (I used 3 cobs)
1 red bell pepper, chopped
1 zucchini, chopped
1/2 red onion, sliced
1 avocado, cut into small pieces
1 lemon, juiced (generally about 1/2 cup)
1/4 cup fresh cilantro, plus 1 tbsp extra
3 tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper to taste

Directions:

Heat a large skillet over medium heat. Add the corn, bell pepper, and zucchini and saute for about 4-5 minutes until the vegetables are just cooked. Remove from pan and set aside. In a large bowl combine the sauteed vegetables, red onion, and avocado and gently mix. In a small food processor combine the lemon, cilantro and olive oil. Process for about 20 seconds until the cilantro is just cut down into smaller pieces. Drizzle this dressing over the vegetables and season with salt and pepper as needed. Sprinkle the last tbsp of fresh cilantro over the top and serve.

If you are short on time, I just mix the dressing right on top of the corn and blend there. Works like a charm and less clean up!

OK, Get along little doggies!!

Bon Appétit!

I love kittens…….but they shouldn’t GLOW!

Kittens

Kittens

Just sayin!

They have been performing this since the 60’s. Think about it. (Pssst, they already have a cure for Aids and Cancer……dead doctor’s don’t lie)

Be the Change!

HUFFINGTON POST, September 12 2011

Scientists are making strides in the fight against HIV/AIDS, and the latest involves … glow-in-the-dark cats.

A Mayo Clinic team has successfully engineered cats to produce a protein that helps their bodies resist the feline immunodeficiency virus (FIV), which causes AIDS in cats. Researchers were able to do this by inserting a monkey gene into feline eggs before they were fertilized with sperm. The genetic engineering has the potential to protect the cats from being infected by FIV.

FIV and the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) are very similar diseases, in that they both deplete the body’s own immune cells from fighting off infection. So, the finding that it’s possible to insert protective genes — though in cats — is also a step forward for HIV research for humans, researchers said.

The team engineered a jellyfish gene into the feline eggs so that they could see if the gene engineering worked — and it did, as evidenced by the cats’ ability to glow in the dark.

The scientists also learned that this genetic protection in the cats can be passed on through generations, because the engineered cats had kittens that were also able to produce proteins that protect against virus invasion.

However, it still remains to be seen if the genetically engineered cats are actually able to resist FIV, though the science is promising, LiveScience reported.

“We haven’t shown cats that are AIDS-proof,” study researcher Eric Poeschla, a molecular biologist and infectious disease specialist at the Mayo Clinic College of Medicine, told LiveScience. “We still have to do infection studies involving whole cats. That the protection gene is expressed in the cat lymphoid organs, where AIDS virus spread and cell death mostly play out, is encouraging to us, however.”

This isn’t the first time a cat has been engineered to glow in the dark. In 2008, TODAY reported that Audubon Nature Institute scientists were able to engineer an orange tabby cat to glow fluorescent green in the darkness. The purpose of that experiment was to see if they could successfully perform gene implantation. Cats and humans have a similar genetic makeup, TODAY reported.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVdLJ78RBWk]

Jalepeno Corn Bread….hmm……….jury is still out on this one!

Jalepeno Corn Bread

Jalapeno Corn Bread

It’s September and I can’t believe the summer has gone. I keep waiting for it to get here in a small way. It’s been a wonderful summer, no doubt but I just could have used a few more days, weeks even another month. Fall is my favorite season so I won’t complain. We’ll just use that summer corn left over and make some memorable dishes.

Here’s all you do:

Jalapeno Corn Bread

1 1/4 cups stone ground yellow corn meal
1/2 cup whole wheat pastry flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup scallions, chopped (reserve 1 tablespoon for sprinkling)
1/4 cup fresh cilantro, chopped
2-3 jalapeno, chopped
2 small garlic clove, peeled and finely minced
1 cup corn kernels, (I used a 1 1/2)
1 cup plain yogurt (I used sour cream)
1/4 cup low fat milk (I used whole milk)
1 egg
1/4 – 1/2 cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese, plus 2 tablespoons for sprinkling over corn bread (I didn’t have cheddar and used Jarlberg….story of my life with this one and it is no substitute for this bread……but didn’t stop me)
1/4 cup canola oil

Preheat oven to 350F. Grease and flour a 9 inch square pan.

In a bowl, with a wire whisk, mix egg, milk, yogurt, and canola oil. Add cheese, corn, jalapenos, garlic, scallions, cilantro and combine. (I threw in a baked & skinned red bell pepper and some onion and my garden chives since I was out of scallions too!) It’s a wonder I made this with all the substitutions but I think it turned out good.

Add flour, corn meal, baking powder and salt and combine with rubber spatula. (Hmmm no sugar or honey). Odd, but didn’t think much about it at the time. Mix wet ingredients with the flour mixture. Pour mixture into prepared pan and sprinkle with half the chopped scallions.

Bake for 35-40 minutes. Last 5 minutes of baking sprinkle remaining cheddar cheese and extra scallions over the top of the corn bread and place back in the oven.

Now before you take a big swallowing bite of this……warm yummy smelling bread….like I did, think about that sugar comment  I made. This recipe didn’t work for me (oh what a surprise). So, when the bread was still quite warm I took my bear bottle of honey and slathered it generously on top of this corn bread. It gently melted into the mixture so you can’t even see it. Very cool! It gave this humble little experiment of mine a subtle sweet yet oh so understated kiss (do I sound like a popular rat here…?) to this corn meally concoction.

I actually skipped the cheese and scallions on top since I got totally distracted with calls and dogs ….and barking and yada yada yada. Using the bell pepper and onions made it just as gorgeous to look at.

As I said, the jury is still out on this one. I served with a wonderous bowl of vegetarian mango chili! It was good. It was real good. Welcome September.

Bon Appétit!

Applesauce Bundt Cake

Applesauce Cake

Applesauce Cake

I needed to make something for the local block party and really wanted to bring a bundt cake. Since I was out of those fabulous pears for my pear cake this bundt recipe really didn’t disappoint. It’s nice and spicy with lots of applesauce so you think you are being a good healthy eater, when in fact it’s dessert so let’s not kid ourselves too much! It is wonderful. A perfect party cake, easy to tote and easy to please just about everyone.

I found this yummy recipe from Food 52 .com (www.food52.com) who I believe picked it up from the Runaway Spoon!  A big thanks to you both.

Here’s all you do:

For the cake:

  • 2 cups all-purpose flour
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon kosher salt
  • 2 teaspoons cinnamon
  • 1 teaspoon ground ginger
  • 1/4 teaspoon ground allspice
  • 1/4 teaspoon cloves
  • 2 large eggs
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 1/2 cup light brown sugar
  • 1 1/2 cups unsweetened (preferably homemade) applesauce
  • 2/3 cup vegetable oil
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla

For the caramel glaze:

  • 4 tablespoons butter
  • 1/4 cup packed light brown sugar
  • 1/3 cup heavy cream
  • 1/4 teaspoon kosher salt
  • 1 cup sifted confectioners’ sugar plus more if needed
    1. Heat the oven to 350 degrees and butter and flour a 12-cup Bundt pan. Sift together the flour, baking soda, salt, spices and set aside. In a large mixing bowl or the bowl of a standing mixer, beat the eggs with both sugars until light. Mix in the applesauce, oil and vanilla until smooth. This is a runny mixture compared to most.
    2. Using a spatula, fold in the dry ingredients, being careful not to over-mix. Pour the batter into the prepared pan and bake for about 45 minutes, until a cake tester inserted comes out clean. Cool the cake for 10 minutes in the pan on a rack before turning it out and cooling completely on the rack; make sure the cake is not at all warm before you make the glaze.
    3. Put the butter in a medium saucepan with the brown sugar, cream and salt and set over medium heat. Bring to a full rolling boil, stirring constantly. Boil for one minute exactly.
    4. Cool the pan for a couple of minutes and then gradually whisk in the powdered sugar until you have a thick, but pourable consistency. If the mixture seems too thick, just add a splash of cream to thin it out a little and if too runny you may want to add more sugar.  Pour the glaze over the cake slowly and evenly. Let the glaze set before serving the cake.
    5. I like ice cream much better than icing (just one of those things), but if you need to stay off the dairy this is a wonderful buttery topping. I also added a 1/2 teaspoon of cinnamon to the icing glaze…….and glad I did.Enjoy with friends and family.

      Bon Appétit!

Gibson Guitars now illegal. The day the music died…….

Gibson Guitars

Gibson Guitars

If you own a Gibson Guitar, even if purchased over twenty years ago, don’t be surprised if swat teams show up on your door step and confiscate this classic and dangerous treasure you own. No, I am not being funny. Swat teams showed up at their factory

Les Paul is rolling over in his grave. The amount of unconstitutional atrocities being imposed on this legendary company is mind-boggling yet it’s becoming a daily occurrence. Innocent employees being interrogated with threat of imprisonment. Going to prison for making a guitar? Are you getting this??? First the Amish….. then dairy farmers……. then garage sales…..lemonade stands………..smart meters…….now guitars?????  We are no longer safe in an insane world and don’t expect this to stop here. Come On Nashville, you have it in you to do something about this!

The New World Order is here. Call your congressmen and make a difference. Otherwise, this and more unfathomable nightmares will continue. Let’s be clear, this isn’t about the wood, this is about the workers using the wood. Made in America is becoming illegal (Lacey Act effective May 22, 2008). They want you to have poisoned food, dirty water, polluted air, and no way for you to feed and clothe your family.

“The mother of debauchery is not joy, but joylessness.”— Nietzsche.

BE THE CHANGE!

Here’s the article from the Wall Street Journal:

Federal agents swooped in on Gibson Guitar Wednesday, raiding factories and offices in Memphis and Nashville, seizing several pallets of wood, electronic files and guitars. The Feds are keeping mum, but in a statement yesterday Gibson’s chairman and CEO, Henry Juszkiewicz, defended his company’s manufacturing policies, accusing the Justice Department of bullying the company. “The wood the government seized Wednesday is from a Forest Stewardship Council certified supplier,” he said, suggesting the Feds are using the aggressive enforcement of overly broad laws to make the company cry uncle.

It isn’t the first time that agents of the Fish and Wildlife Service have come knocking at the storied maker of such iconic instruments as the Les Paul electric guitar, the J-160E acoustic-electric John Lennon played, and essential jazz-boxes such as Charlie Christian’s ES-150. In 2009 the Feds seized several guitars and pallets of wood from a Gibson factory, and both sides have been wrangling over the goods in a case with the delightful name “United States of America v. Ebony Wood in Various Forms.”

The question in the first raid seemed to be whether Gibson had been buying illegally harvested hardwoods from protected forests, such as the Madagascar ebony that makes for such lovely fretboards. And if Gibson did knowingly import illegally harvested ebony from Madagascar, that wouldn’t be a negligible offense. Peter Lowry, ebony and rosewood expert at the Missouri Botanical Garden, calls the Madagascar wood trade the “equivalent of Africa’s blood diamonds.” But with the new raid, the government seems to be questioning whether some wood sourced from India met every regulatory jot and tittle.

It isn’t just Gibson that is sweating. Musicians who play vintage guitars and other instruments made of environmentally protected materials are worried the authorities may be coming for them next.

If you are the lucky owner of a 1920s Martin guitar, it may well be made, in part, of Brazilian rosewood. Cross an international border with an instrument made of that now-restricted wood, and you better have correct and complete documentation proving the age of the instrument. Otherwise, you could lose it to a zealous customs agent—not to mention face fines and prosecution.

John Thomas, a law professor at Quinnipiac University and a blues and ragtime guitarist, says “there’s a lot of anxiety, and it’s well justified.” Once upon a time, he would have taken one of his vintage guitars on his travels. Now, “I don’t go out of the country with a wooden guitar.”

The tangled intersection of international laws is enforced through a thicket of paperwork. Recent revisions to 1900’s Lacey Act require that anyone crossing the U.S. border declare every bit of flora or fauna being brought into the country. One is under “strict liability” to fill out the paperwork—and without any mistakes.

It’s not enough to know that the body of your old guitar is made of spruce and maple: What’s the bridge made of? If it’s ebony, do you have the paperwork to show when and where that wood was harvested and when and where it was made into a bridge? Is the nut holding the strings at the guitar’s headstock bone, or could it be ivory? “Even if you have no knowledge—despite Herculean efforts to obtain it—that some piece of your guitar, no matter how small, was obtained illegally, you lose your guitar forever,” Prof. Thomas has written. “Oh, and you’ll be fined $250 for that false (or missing) information in your Lacey Act Import Declaration.”

Consider the recent experience of Pascal Vieillard, whose Atlanta-area company, A-440 Pianos, imported several antique Bösendorfers. Mr. Vieillard asked officials at the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species how to fill out the correct paperwork—which simply encouraged them to alert U.S. Customs to give his shipment added scrutiny.

There was never any question that the instruments were old enough to have grandfathered ivory keys. But Mr. Vieillard didn’t have his paperwork straight when two-dozen federal agents came calling.

Facing criminal charges that might have put him in prison for years, Mr. Vieillard pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor count of violating the Lacey Act, and was handed a $17,500 fine and three years probation.

Given the risks, why don’t musicians just settle for the safety of carbon fiber? Some do—when concert pianist Jeffrey Sharkey moved to England two decades ago, he had Steinway replace the ivories on his piano with plastic.

Still, musicians cling to the old materials. Last year, Dick Boak, director of artist relations for C.F. Martin & Co., complained to Mother Nature News about the difficulty of getting elite guitarists to switch to instruments made from sustainable materials. “Surprisingly, musicians, who represent some of the most savvy, ecologically minded people around, are resistant to anything about changing the tone of their guitars,” he said.

You could mark that up to hypocrisy—artsy do-gooders only too eager to tell others what kind of light bulbs they have to buy won’t make sacrifices when it comes to their own passions. Then again, maybe it isn’t hypocrisy to recognize that art makes claims significant enough to compete with environmentalists’ agendas.